MATRIĊI Biex tkun vera Matriċi, il-knisja omm trid taddotta lill-parroċċa bint, u l-isqof jistabbilixxi għeliem kif il-parroċċa bint (li tissejjaħ ‘il-filjali’) għandha turi r-rispett lill-parroċċa omm. Pereżempju: Meta Ta’ Sannat, ix-Xagħra, in-Nadur u ż-Żebbuġ saru parroċċi, l-isqof semma x’kienu ngħataw bħala dota. Biss, kien ukoll ordna lill-kappillani l-ġodda biex jagħtu xemgħa ta’ libbra lill-arċipriet tal-Matriċi ta’ Santa Marija, waqt il-quddiesa solenni ta’ nhar il-festa titulari fil-15 ta’ Awwissu, lebsin bl-ispellizza u bl-istola, bħala għelm ta’ suġġestjoni lejh. Ħajr: Anton F. Attard.
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Nixfa

Joseph Henry Abela, Qassis
Il-21 ta’ Ġunju jfisser bidu tas-Sajf, ifisser btala, ifisser sħana, telqa, għeja.
Jekk ma taħsibx minn qabel fejn jista’ jkollok il-frisk, tispiċċa biex taħrab kull xogħol, ħidma u ċaqlaq.
Jekk taħseb biex ikollok mkien ta’ kenn u ma telqekx. Is-sħana tħossok fl-aħjar tiegħek. Il-qsari jgħinu, ilwien ma jgħajtux ukoll. Xorb frisk jew inkella ikel bħal frott inaqqas is-sħana għalik.

X’għandek maħsub għas-sajf? Tarf ta’ ġonna qrib fejn toqgħod għandek fejn jista’ ikun hemm il-kurrent bejn persjana u bieb miftuħ, bejn ritratti tal-ilma u pultruna ħafifa u purtieri tal-qasab li jilqgħu s-sħana.
Is-sħana taf tixorbok u tnixxfek u toħodlok l-aptit kollu tal-ħajja. Jekk iżżomm ruħek fil-frisk, ilma bin-nagħniegħ, palju, imrewħa, kappell tat-tibna: kollox jgħin.
Tħallix is-sajf ikiddek. Bi ħsieb is-sajf ukoll jogħġbok u jagħtik saħħtek.
The Lottery Ticket
Everybody in the village knew Pawlu. Not because he held any esteemed position in the community, nor because he ever did anything exceptional to be remembered for, nor because he liked to mingle freely among the different folk of the village. However Pawlu was the church warden. It was always he who at every mass, be it on weekdays or on Sundays, with collection box in hand, went around the congregation collecting money for the church. And it was often he who led the faithful to recite the rosary before the first evening mass.
Pawlu was 51 years old, still as light and agile as a cat, a good soul and a loving family man. But he had one obsession which only his wife knew about. He was a gambler. Not a heavy one mind you, but a gambler all the same. A man of very modest means, he always thought that one day he would be rich.
All throughout his adult life, every week without fail, he staked a few euros either on a ‘lotto’ or a ‘super five’ or a ‘lottery’ ticket. With his optimistic nature he always expected that he would win, always thought that, this time, his numbers would come out of the large rotating urn holding all the issued tickets. But they never did and he never won.
His wife Marie had a different character altogether. She was mild-mannered, of a calm nature and satisfied with her position in life. Unlike her husband, she did not crave for more money and the modest wage Pawlu brought home each week was enough to make her life comfortable and enjoyable.
Marie repeatedly admonished Pawlu for throwing away money over his weekly stakes. “A gambler”, she used to tell him, “is always a loser, never a winner!” If he had saved the money he had paid for the stake tickets he had bought these last thirty years, she always told him, they would have had a good sum of money in the bank, not nothing.
But Pawlu was certain that one day his numbers, which he never changed, would make him rich. “You’ll see Marie, you’ll see. When I win the one million euros, I’ll buy you a nice house in the new part of the village. And we’ll go for a long holiday. You’ll be so happy that I persisted in playing these blessed numbers”, he told her.
He continued with his mission in life, week in week out, always the same numbers, all signifying some dates or ages close to his heart. He did not trust his short-sighted wife to get him the tickets, being afraid that she would mess up his numbers. “Some day I‘ll become rich” he would often say to himself. And while in church, he would pray to his favourite saints to intercede on his behalf so that his wish would be granted. For thirty years he kept faith. “One day,” he always thought, “one day my luck will turn.”
He would buy his weekly tickets, kiss them tenderly, put them in the jar on the top of the kitchen side-board and wait for the draw on the Wednesday. It was a ritual. Sometimes, out of the same five numbers on which he put his stakes, he would get one number right, or two, or on rare occasions, three numbers. But no wins.
One evening Marie was following the draw on television. The numbers were being extracted from the rotating urn. One, two, three, four, five numbers! Pawlu’s numbers! She could not believe it. She opened the jar, took out the tickets and WOW, they had won it, over one million euros. She just could not believe it!
Pawlu was still at the church, assisting the parish priest at evening mass, after which he made preparations for the morrow’s early mass. Then he bid good bye to the parish priest and left for home. As soon as he entered the house Marie, tears in her eyes, shouted at him –“Pawlu, you’ve won, your five numbers have been drawn, and we’re rich Pawlu, rich!!”
Pawlu stood motionless, at first not realizing what Marie was telling him. Then, still not sure, he told her. “Is it true Marie, this is no joke is it? How do you know?” “I am sure Pawlu. I just heard and saw the numbers on television. I checked with your ticket. Here see for yourself. They’re your five numbers!” she answered breathlessly.
The impact of this news then struck Pawlu. His thirty-year long cherished dream of becoming rich had finally come true. He was now the happiest man on earth. As this realization sunk in, his face became as white as a sheet; sweat seeped down from his face and a stabbing pain run across his chest.
As he clutched his chest with both his hands, he fell on the floor right in front of Marie. She uttered a scream and ran out for help. When the doctor came and examined him, he pronounced him dead. After Marie recounted the events as they had happened, the doctor certified that death was caused by a heart attack, probably following strong, emotional joy on hearing the news of his substantial win.
But the story did not end there. It had another twist. After the funeral, Marie went to the Lotto Receiver with Pawlu’s ticket. He checked the numbers, looked at Marie and told her – “You have a winning ticket with four numbers, not five. The prize is 200 euros!” In her excitement Marie had made a mistake of the last number.
Pawlu, poor soul, had died in vain after all!
Irmied uman fil-‘bullets’
Charles B. Spiteri

F’pajjiżi fejn il-kremazzjoni (il-ħruq tal-katavri flok dfin) hu komuni ferm, issa qed jingħata tifsira ġdida għall-familjari tal-mejjet.
Idea li żgur tingħoġob minn dawk li jħobbu l-armi tan-nar, hi dik ta’ kumpanija Amerikana li qed toffri li tissiġilla l-irmied tal-familjari f’bullets.
Il-kumpanija Holy Smoke (Duħħan Qaddis) tinsab f’Alabama u hi mmexxija minn Clem Parnell u Thad Holmes. Meta huma jippriservaw l-irmied fil-bullets, jagħtuhom lill-klijenti f’kaxxa speċjali ta’ preżentazzjoni. Iżda għal min ikun irid, huma jħalltu l-irmied ma’ splussiv u jwasslu lill-klijent fi vjaġġ, fejn ikun jista’ jispara xi wħud mill-bullets.
Il-ħlas hu ta’ €798 għal 100 bullet tar-rifle jew 150 bullet tal-pistola u €72.50 għall-kaxxa tal-preżentazzjoni magħmula mill-injam. Persuna medja tipproduċi bejn ħames u sitt libbri ta’ rmied wara l-kremazzjoni u Holy Smoke tuża biss libbra ta’ rmied biex twettaq ħidmietha.
Is-sidien tan-negozju jgħidu li jirċievu bejn erba’ u ħames ordnijiet fix-xahar mill-Istati Uniti, iżda hemm nies oħra li qed jidhru interessati, fosthom mill-Ġappun, l-Awstralja, ir-Repubblika Ċeka u mill-Gran Britannja.
Huma jsostnu wkoll li jekk il-fdal ta’ persuna jimtlew f’bullets mal-porvli, joffru assigurazzjoni lill-familjari f’każ li jidħol xi ħadd fuqhom biex jisraqhom, u b’hekk tibqa’ rabta sħiħa bejn il-mejjet jew mejta u niesu ħajjin. Hemm min jippreferi li bullet minnhom tkun pendent biex tinġarr kuljum fuq il-persuna li tibqa’ ħajja.
Misraħ
MISRAĦ (pl. msieraħ) Ġan Franġisk Abela (1647) jiddeskrivi l-misraħ bħala l-pjazza tar-raħal qrib il-knisja, fejn in-nies kienu jinġabru fil-jum tal-Ħadd jew f’xi festa pubblika biex iqattgħu l-ħin jitħaddtu flimkien. Fil-ktieb Place-names ta’ Godfrey Wettinger insibu aktar minn erbgħin post li fih hemm inkluż dan l-appellattiv. Biss, dawn x’aktarx kienu nħawi fejn jirgħaw il-mogħoż. Fost dawn insibu Misraħ il-Kbir, Misraħ il-Mitħna, Misraħ il-Wardija u l-Imsieraħ, li llum ħafna minnu nbena u sar il-lokalità ta’ San Ġwann.
Karozza bla ħtieġa ta’ sewwieq
Charles B. Spiteri

Il-kumpanija Google dan l-aħħar ħabbret li se tibni karozza li tinstaq weħidha – u l-pjani huma li fi żmien sena ssir rivoluzzjoni sħiha fil-vetturi fit-triq.
Sergey Brin, ko-fundatur kixef din il-karozza, li se tkun mgħammra biss b’buttuna ta’ ‘suq’ u ‘ieqaf’ u tkun kapaċi ttella’ ħeffa sa 25 mil fis-siegħa.
Flok ma ħadmet fuq karozza li diġa’ tinsab fis-suq, il-kumpanija ġganteska bniet il-mudell tagħha u qed taħdem fuq madwar 100 prototip biex saritilhom il-prova. Il-ħsieb wara dawn il-karozzi hu li jneħħu l-uġigħ ta’ ras minn fuq is-sewwieqa.
Id-disinn tal-karozza hu ta’ wiċċ ħabib, biex in-nies ma taqtax qalbha u taċċetta din it-teknoloġija ġdida.
Ingħad li dawn il-karozzi se jnaqqsu bosta problemi, fosthom li waqt il-ħin tal-kolazzjon, il-ħaddiema jistgħu jmorru jduru mingħajr il-ħsieb li jsibu fejn jipparkjaw. L-anzjani jistgħu jmorru fejn iridu bla ma jġorru ċwievet, u l-aqwa fosthom hu għal dawk is-sewwieqa li jkunu xorbu xi grokk żejjed u ma jixtiqux isuqu lura.
Dawn il-karozzi ma għandhomx, la steering, la pedala tal-gass u lanqas tal-brejk… għax m’għandhomx bżonnhom. Chris Urmsom, direttur tal-proġett qal li s-software u s-sensors se jagħmlu x-xogħol kollu huma. Li hemm fil-karozzi huma biss il-buttuna ta’ ‘suq’ u ‘ieqaf’ u screen li juri r-rotta.
Urmon qal li l-karozzi se jirrivoluzzjonaw is-sewqan, b’mod li s-sigurta’ tingħata prijorita’.
Naspla
NASPLA Il-qawl ‘In-naspla saret u ċ-ċawla taret’ hu spjegat fil-ktieb ‘Ara X’Int Tgħid’. Ma’ dak spjegat xtaqt nagħti biss xi informazzjoni oħra li għaddihieli Anton F. Attard. Dan il qawl hu x’aktarx mibdul mit-taqbila oriġinali. Il-qawl suppost jgħid hekk: Il-lira sfaret u ċ-ċawla taret. It-taqbila nħolqot meta fi tmiem tas-seklu dsatax kien falla l-Bank ta’ Rosa Pace, li kien imlaqqam ‘il-Bank taċ-Ċawla’. Dan il-Bank kien jinsab fi Strada San Franġisk, il-Furjana. Anki t-triq fejn kien hemm dan il-Bank spiċċat imlaqqma ‘It-Triq taċ-Ċawla’. Meta Rosa Pace bdiet tissellef il-flus tad-deheb bi mgħax għoli, falliet. Ir-riferenza għall-flus li sfaru hi għal-liri tad-deheb. Meta falla l-Bank, lil Pace tellgħuha l-Qorti iżda ħarġet illiberata u għamlet festa. Ħajr: Anton F. Attard.
Panew
PANEW (f’sens ta’ arkitettura) (pl. panewijiet) Wieħed jista’ jirreferi b’dan in-nom għal xi tip ta’ dekorazzjoni fil-ġebel, ħafna drabi maħduma fis-saqaf ġo xi bini antik ta’ ċerta importanza. F’Malta hawn ħafna binjiet fejn is-saqaf hu ddekorat f’dan l-istil. Forsi l-aktar li jispikkaw huma dawk ta’ xi knejjes, inkella s-soqfa f’xi bereġ tal-Ordni. Jidher li dan l-istil dekorattiv kien beda jkun applikat f’Malta mit-tieni nofs tas-seklu sittax. Naraw dan ix-xogħol f’bosta binjiet, pereżempju fl-entratura oriġinali tal-Berġa tal-Italja, fi Triq il-Merkanti, il-Belt, kif ukoll fil-binja tal-Berġa ta’ Franza, fil-Birgu. II-kelma x’aktarx ittieħdet minn PANNELL, li tfisser ‘drapp li jitqiegħed taħt is-sarġ fuq dahar iż-żiemel’. Bl-Ingliż coffering.

Ferħana b’126 Dixxendent
Charles B. Spiteri

Mara ta’ 91 sena li kienet l-unika tarbija tal-familja tagħha, u li darba ħasbet ukoll li tidħol soru, issa tiftaħar li għandha 126 dixxendent.
Id-deċiżjoni aħħarija ta’ Peggy Koller li ma tidħolx f’kunvent wasslitha biex tiżżewweġ u saret omm ta’ 11-il tarbija.
Illum il-ġurnata, uliedha subien u bniet, il-proneputijiet (56) u l-proproneputijiet (59), kollha jgħidu li Peggy hi d-direttur soċjali tal-familja, li żżomm lil kulħadd infurmat b’kull ġrajja u ċelebrazzjoni tal-familja.
Bħalissa Koller tqatta’ kull tmiem il-ġimgħa tiġri għal xi gradwazzjoni, żwieġ, magħmudija jew ċerimonji oħra, biex żgur ħadd minn uliedha ma jgorr. Meta tiġi ġurnata li ma jkollha ebda appuntament, tagħmel ftit eżerċizzju fiżiku.
Hi u żewġha William iżżewġu fl-1942 u ħadmu bħala kummissjonanti f’Philadelphia. Kellhom il-Koller Funeral Home. Wara li William miet fl-2008, in-negozju tagħhom baqa’ jitmexxa minn tnejn minn uliedhom.
L-ogħla kafè fid-dinja
Charles B. Spiteri

Jingħad li dan it-tip ta’ kafè mibjugħ fil-ħanut Starbucks, hu l-aktar wieħed li jiswa flus. Fih 60 espresso shots u jiswa €41.20.
Is-Sexagintuple Vanilla Bean Mocha Frappuccino, li fih 128 uqija, kien ordnat fi Starbucks, Texas u aktarx li hu meqjus mill-kumpanija bħala li jżomm it-titlu tal-aktar xarba għolja li qatt kellhom għall-bejgħ.
Ix-xarba nxtrat minn klijent magħruf biss bħala Andrew, li qiegħed ir-ritratt tiegħu fuq Twitter, bit-tazza ġganteska bil-kafè u l-irċevuta li ħallas għalih.
Iżda minkejja li l-Frappuccino jiswa aktar minn €41.2, Andrew ma ħallas xejn għalih, peress li hu gold member, fil-programm ta’ lealtà lejn Starbucks.
Il-programm jippermetti lill-gold members jieħdu xarba bla ħlas ma’ kull 12 li jixtru, u dak li jieħdu jista’ jkun għoli kemm iridu.
Għalhekk seta’ jieħu kafè kbir kemm ried, u peress li kien jaf li ma kellhomx kikkra kbira biżżejjed, hu ħa miegħu wkoll it-tazza tiegħu fil-ħanut.
Din ix-xarba qabżet dik tas-sena l-oħra, li tqieset bħala rekord, fejn raġel xtara 48-shot Frappuccino, li sewa €34.43